Meaning, Purpose, and Spirituality: Three Keys to Flourishing
Meaning and purpose often get used interchangeably, but they are actually separate (albeit related) concepts.
Meaning helps us bridge our actions and experiences to an overarching story of our lives. A life full of meaning feels coherent, significant, and worthwhile. According to Martin Seligman, who created the PERMA model of Flourishing, it involves using your strengths in service to something or someone beyond your self. In fact, being of service is one of the greatest and most overlooked antidotes to depression and anxiety.
Purpose is a stable, internalized direction or long-term goal that aligns with your values. If meaning is the “why,” purpose is the “how” and “what.” It is the daily, intentional application of effort to accomplish something meaningful to you. Importantly, there is a wide spread misconception that we all have 1 big, ‘capital P’ purpose to live out while we’re on earth. That can create a lot of pressure and anxiety. What’s true is that we all can have many different purposes, and they can and should change throughout the seasons of our life. Yes, some people feel they have a calling or vocation, and sometimes that is connected to the paid work they do in the world. But for many of us, our purpose is lived out in our day-to-day and might not be connected to our career (although, I do think it’s important to feel purposeful in our work if that’s where we’re spending so many of our waking hours). Purpose isn't something you discover once. It's something you practice.
When I look at the greatest examples of a life well lived, these people always seem to be deeply connected to meaning and purpose, but also to spirituality.
Spirituality is deeply personal, and we probably all have different ideas about what that word means. It is associated with religion, but distinct. Religion is a set of organized beliefs, traditions, rituals and doctrines. Spirituality is more about a relationship. The question of what we are in relationship to is a big one and because of that there is always some element of mystery and awe inherent to spirituality. Some people experience this transcendence through their religion, while others find it through different avenues. I would say that spirituality is a worldview that says there is some intelligent force out there that we can personally connect with. And similarly to purpose- and really meaning as well- it is also a practice.
I think what’s important to keep in mind is that to live a fully flourishing life, we must
- choose to find meaning in the ordinary and even the painful
- continue to uncover and work towards things that feel purposeful
- make space for the big questions
Essentially, we have to zoom out from our little individual lives and problems and to-do lists, and connect to something outside of ourselves, something bigger.
